I’ve been struggling with what to write lately. To begin, I started this blog with the intention of just getting my thoughts out of my head, and sharing parts of my heart. I really only ever expected some of my friends and maybe a few random others to read what I’ve written. Not really expecting much, I was thrilled to have fifty or sixty views on a post.
Then I wrote “an open letter to my non-Christian friends.” I sat awestruck as the wave of notifications flooded in from Facebook, Twitter, and WordPress. 700+ views. While I am quite aware that I am a very small dot on the map of the world wide web, that’s about as close to “viral” as I’ve ever experienced. I very quickly lost track of who was sharing it, and couldn’t help but wonder, “Who are all these people reading my thoughts, examining my heart?” And almost as quickly, I was overcome with anxiety and a deluge of questions: “What do they think?” “Will it have an impact on anyone?” “How am I supposed to follow this up?”
What followed next is simply said as this: the river dried up. My mind, which is usually a torrent of questions and debates and imaginings, couldn’t piece seemingly piece together even the simplest of cogent thoughts. It was as if my mind became a wilderness full of disorder and stress. So, I did what my knee-jerk reaction has been for quite some time: I buried myself in work, in ministry, and the busyness of the Christmas season. One month later, I finally feel like the river of my mind has returned to a normal level. If anything, I feel as if the river is going to continue to rise, and more thoughts and passions are going to come flooding out than ever before.
So this: to everyone who read and/or shared “an open letter,” thank you. I am honored and humbled that so many people considered my thoughts worth reading. I hope that perhaps someone, somewhere, is grateful that you shared it. I will gladly continue writing and sharing my thoughts as I’m led, regardless of how many readers they reach. Everyone is welcome to read and share my writing as they wish.
What lies ahead? I don’t have a firm answer for that question. There is one challenge to which I believe I am being called: twenty-nine days (it’s a leap year!) of sharing in February. I’m not quite sure what to expect out of it (perhaps no expectations are the best), but I believe that God is going to dig into my heart and mind in a new way to show me things I’ve never imagined, and I am excited to share them with everyone. I hope to share some before then to though, so stay tuned.
If you or anyone you know is impacted by anything I write or have written, any and all feedback is welcome. I love hearing what others think, and would be glad to engage in (civil) discussion. Feel free to contact me through my blog, Facebook, or Twitter.
Again: Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! To everyone who read “an open letter.” You made me feel like a rockstar! I don’t do this seeking fame or attention, just an opportunity to express myself and welcome others into my heart and mind. I look forward to getting back to this grand adventure, and hope that maybe some of you will join me along the way.